बूंद

हर लम्हा,
हर घड़ी,
वक्त के साथ,
हम बहते चले जाते है।

कभी किसी झील,
कभी कोई नीली नदी,
और कभी एक वृहद्‍ समुन्द्र में,
हम समा जाते है ।

कोई इस बूंद से न पूछे कभी,
की इसे जाना कहाँ है,
मान लेते है सब इसे भी भीड़ में चलना है,
और पाना यह जहान है।

फिर एक दिन एक प्यारी परी ने उस बहती नदी के किनारे,
इस बूंद को अपने हथेलियों पर उठाया,
और मेरी इस भागती जिंदगी में,
एक गहर ठहराव आया।

आज जब कोई पूछें मुझे -
"हे बंधु, तुम्हे जाना कहाँ है!",
सच तोह यह है की ख़ुशी जहाँ हो,
मुझे जाना वहाँ है।

उस खुशी कि खोज में,
मैं गहरे समंदर में समां गया,
ख़ुशी मिली न मुझे,
और अंधकार छा गया।

तब उस परी की यादों ने मुझको संभाला,
मांगी थी थोड़ी सी ख़ुशी,
मगर तेरी एक मुस्कराहट में,
सारा जहान मैंने पाया।

Anecdotes of an Invigilator

TA 202 Mid Semester Examination

L17, IIT Kanpur

Mentioned below are some short humorous incidents that happened over a period of one and a half hour.

I was silently roaming at the back of the lecture hall like a ghost.
I noticed three dudes cheering and talking in the last row.
"Kyun laundo, kaafi kush dikh rahe ho tumlog. Aakhir baat kya hai? Settle ho gaye ho kya."
"Sir, seating arrangement ke hisaab se baithe hai. Aap cheating karne dijiyega na?"
"Mujhe toh yahan 'cheating' arrangement dikh raha hai. Mil jhul ke kaam karna. Taqdeer tumhare saath hai."


A guy used to give me a stare whenever he got stuck at some question.
Again.
And again.
And again.
It was high time I confronted him.
"Tum gay ho kya laundey. Kya main bahut sundar dikhta hoon?"
"Nahi sir, bas atak gaye the sawaal pe."
"Abey agar atakte ho toh bagal ke paper ko dekha karo. Humko dekhne se thodi na solution mil jayega."
"Thik hai sir." 
Aur achanak se uske shakal mein aayi is muskurahat ko dekh mera dil paseej gaya.


A cute girl raised her hand.
Like a vortex causing a whirlpool, 
withdrawing water all around,
Invigilators from all corners of the room,
Poured their heart and soul to save this damsel in distress.
A bakra was needed.

"Ankit come here!"
I was summoned and ordered to meet the instructor-in-charge in L-7. All this labour, just for one cute girl. But an order is an order, and I had to carry it out.
I went and got scolded instead.
And when I returned to her, she spoke the magical words - "Sir, doubt nahi tha. Samajh aa gaya."


"Sir, OARS mein mera section C-14 hai aur sir jo mail bheje usme C-9 likha hua tha. Toh paper mein kya likhe?"
"Tumhaare tutor kaun hai?"
"Nahi pata sir."
"Class jaate ho?"
"Nahi sir."
"Ek kaam karo .."
Eagerly, he lent me his ears, "Haan sir, boliye .."
"Dono likh do. Tumko benefit of doubt jaroor milega."


I picked another unique piece next.
"Launde tumko constipation hua hai kya?"
"Nahi Sir."
"Toh itna pareshaan kyun dikh rahe ho?"
"Sir rubber laana bhul gaye. Share karna allowed nahi hai."
"Toh pareshaan hone se thodi na rubber mil jayega."
I picked up an eraser, "Yeh lo. Jaldi mita ke wapas karo. Aur yeh loose motion wala shakal mat banana aage se kabhi."


Another chap raised his hand.
I undertook a voyage floating through a score of rows.
"Kya hua? Haath kyun uthaye ho? Koi doubt hai kya?"
"Nahi sir, hum kuch soch rahe the."


His partner was struggling with a CNC code.
A shock he got, I could very well understand.
"CNC nahi padh ke aaye na. Soche hoge important nahi hai. ECM, EDM, Lathe ke jagah CNC code kyun puchenge."
"Haan sir." He said in a muffled voice.
"Yehi hota hai. Main tumhaari peedha samajh sakta hoon. Jo theek se padhaya nahi jaata hai, exam mein wahi aata hai. Code nahi banega on spot. Na isme logic hota hai aur na hi proper syntax. Bas rat ke aana hota hai book ka example, jo tum karna bhool gaye."


And then there was one, who preferred to sleep peacefully as if he had found heaven on earth.
I stood beside him, watching the droplets of saliva falling from his mouth.
He woke up.
"Yaar room pe jaake so jao. Accha neend aayega."
"Sir ek ghante baad mera VIVA hai, agar room pe gaye toh phir uth nahi paayenge."


Then I saw something unusual.
Another cute girl whispering to her companion to show her the schematic of the Electrochemical Machining process. But, her companion didn't even buzz.
She betrayed her.
It was Treachery.
It was Blasphemy.
Paap hai yeh.

 
I approached her stealthily.
"Oye, cheating kar rahi hai?"
She turned and said in a mesmerizing voice - "Naaahiii siiir."
"Dekho yaar tumhaare saath dhoka ho chuka hai. Aise thodi na cheating hota hai. Woh kuch question kar rahi hai, tum kuch aur pooch rahi ho. Strategy banana padhta hai. Lekin yahan tumhaare saath gaddari ho chuki hai. Toh agle baar se be careful. Pick a guy he will always help you."
And her smile faded.


I glanced into the answer sheet of the traitor. There she was, documenting the CNC code. Who on earth does that. Her neat and tidy booklet reminded me of someone.
"Sir, yeh lijiye. Ho gaya mera."
I flipped the pages.
"Choti Jaipuria tumko toh pura number milega. Yeh toh mera bhagya hai ki mujhe shakshaat Mataji ke booklet ke darshan ho gaye."


Half an hour to go and only a lone warrior was left behind, fighting his battle.
"Launde, jung khatam ho chuka hai. Hathiyaar daal do."
"Haan sir, aap thik keh rahe hai. Yeh lijiye mera paper."
"Toh is jung mein haare ho ya jeete ho?"
"Sir, lag toh raha hai ki haar chuke hai."
"Koi baat nahi haar ke jeetne wale ko baazigar kehte hai. Endsem mein fir milenge."

English Bites by Manish Gupta: Book Review

English Bites is a completely novel way of learning English and improving your vocabulary. Manish Gupta has taken a completely different approach which I had never come across before. He has weaved 1000+ words around his story - The struggle and determination to improve his English which was an essential part for shaping his career.
 
Each chapter of the book represents a phase in his life which he narrates in a humorous fashion and not just combines it with some lessons in English, but also presents various interesting facts. This book is definitely a fun way of learning English and I recommend you to give it a shot and I am sure it won't just improve your vocab, but also there will be times when you will see yourself rolling on the floor laughing when you will read some gems hidden in this book. 

According to the author this book can be used by candidates of CAT/GRE/XAT/GMAT, those who wish to develop a better command over English, and any language enthusiast. Personally, I feel it should be read by everyone as it is definitely worth the time you spend on it and you will definitely end up gaining something in return.

Looking forward to his next release.

My Butterfly

My Butterfly,
I remember the day,
You bumped into me.
Well, sort of floated,
Appeared out of thin air, apparently.

My Butterfly,
You laughed, and whispered in my ear,
'I picked you out,
And just floated down,
And landed on your shoulder.'

My Butterfly,
You are beautiful and graceful,
Varied and enchanting, small but approachable.
You are my little miss sunshine,
Leading me to the sunny side of life.

My Butterfly,
With you, I floated,
Through the wonders of the world.
I wish we could share the joy we found,
With everyone living on earth.

My Butterfly,
I gifted you, fractal flowers and plasma trees.
And now I present you a beautiful meadow,
Where you can sip the nectar of life,
From the sunflowers, violets and white lilies.

My Butterfly,
Sometimes I stumble,
I fall, and you tumble alongside.
But, I promise you, I'll rise, and pick you up,
And protect you my entire life.

My Butterfly,
You taught me love and happiness,
Goes where it pleases, pleases wherever it goes.
When pursued, is beyond the grasp,
But if we sit still, might alight upon us.

My Butterfly,
Now your wings are strong, you can soar high.
I'll be lying on the grass, waiting, wondering,
My life would have been incomplete,
Without you, my love, my butterfly.

- Ankit M.

Puppy Love Infographic

Here's the info-graphic I made for the latest Valentine's Day app Puppy Love developed by Programming Club guys Ankush and Shivanshu.