One woman who looked at me a little more closely

I had a wife.
I loved her.
Just wait. I really loved her.
We had a tiny room with hardly any furniture.
We even ate dinner on the floor, because we had no table.
I was a junior researcher in a physics institute.
I was developing one of my ideas.
My wife had to work three jobs so we could make ends meet.
Long story short, I invented a new
tunnel diode.
It's...
It's hard to explain.
At work they congratulated me...
...gave me a 50-ruble bonus
and proposed I work on a new project
So I went home with the result of three years' work:
Fifty rubles.
My wife gave me a look like you'd give.
A large foreign company offered to buy my patent for a lot of money.
But I said no, I wanted it to be used here, in my country.
I offered it to various places.
They said "It's great".
But nobody needed it. Nobody.
I began to drink.
I began to drink terribly.
I lost my job, my wife left me.
I only cared about drinking.
Morning, noon, and night.
I was dead drunk from morning to night.
It was awful.


One day I sensed I would die soon.
And the thought even made me happy,
It didn't scare me at all.
All I wanted was for it to be soon.
I began to look for death, I really did, I looked for it.
I would fight with police, bother people.
I got beaten up and cut.
I slept on the street, in and out of hospitals.
I was beaten to a pulp.
But I'd pull through and crawl back out.
At home I'd lick my wounds like a stray dog and then crawl out again.
My only fear was jumping under a train or out of a window.
Don't know why, it just scared me.


One day I was on a train, dreadfully drunk.
I was filthy, I stank.
The train was full
I was bothering everyone: Yelling, cursing.
But I looked at myself and I was glad.
My vileness made me glad!
My only wish was that someone would take me and toss me off the train so I'd bash my brains on the rails.
But they all just sat silently.
They looked away, but they sat silently.
Except for one woman with her five-year-old daughter.
I heard the little girl say:
"Mama, that man's crazy. I'm scared".
But the woman said:
"No, he's not crazy. He's just very, very sad".


I sold my invention to a foreign company.
Today it's used in almost half of all cell phones.
I work there.
But that's not important.
The woman is now my wife and the girl is my daughter.
We also have a son. He's 4 years old.


Is that it?
No, there's more.
Me, I should have died in the gutter.
But I didn't.
Because one person, just one looked at me a little more closely than everyone else.
And didn't let me remain...
...in my lonely wretchedness.

#Adapted From A Russian True Story

Internship Hunt - Act II Scene II [ITC : Fire]

Previously  : Act II Scene I [ITC : Cigarettes]

It was a tiny Group Discussion (GD) room accommodating Arihant, Pawan, Hunaid, Abhishek, me and three others.


All Eight of them looking at each other,
With tension brimming on their faces. 
Wondering in which accent should they speak,
Whether to make valid arguments,
Or shout and subdue others.
None of them had a clue,
What the topic would be ?

Soon the three judges entered. I don't remember their names.
All I remember is that one was old, one was bald  and the lady was very pretty.
We were given 2 minutes to read the topic and next 18 minutes to discuss and reach a conclusion.

The topic was as follows :
You along with your 7 other friends have just experienced a plane crash. Nobody is injured. Your plane crashed in a tropical rain forest and it rains often. All you have are the fifteen items given below :
Machete
Anti-Venom
Plastic bags
First aid kit
Radio
Compass
Cigarette Lighter
Knife
Gun
Rope
Vacuum Flask
Torch
... and three more

Our task was to rank these items in the order of importance individually and then discuss and come up with group ranking as we can carry only half the number of items out of these in order to survive and come out of the forest.

"Your time starts now!" - the pretty lady stated with a smile. All the three judges occupied a corner each. They had score sheets in their hands which made the atmosphere even more tensed.
"Okay friends so we are here to discuss and rank these items in the given scenario." - Hunaid all set to take a lead.
"Wait, first let us read and rank them individually." - Everyone blurted unanimously.
Hunaid was disappointed. He scored a negative for making a wrong move.
2 minutes passed ..
3 minutes passed ..
I was scribbling all points which were coming in my mind.
Recalling all survival strategies taught by Bear Grylis in Man vs Wild.
Confidence started to sink in.
4 minutes passed ..
Each one of us was looking like a hungry wolf ready to charge when Abhishek said, "Okay, friends we are losing time so lets start discussing the group rankings."
"We can divide the items into two categories - Survival and Path Finding. And then proceed towards ranking them." - he continued
We quickly started dividing items into the two groups, iterating over each item.
Path Finding - Radio, Compass
Survival - Machete, Anti-Venom, Plastic bags, First aid kit, Knife, Gun, Rope, Vacuum Flask ..
Our divide and conquer strategy failed miserably as this categorization was not helping us to reach our objective. Soon we realized that we have wasted more than 4 minutes over it and there was a clear consensus to chunk this idea and start afresh.

Our next strategy was to suggest an item each for group ranking. Finally we were on track nearing our objective function.
Rank #1:
Abhishek [First Aid] - "To avoid minor crash wound infection."
Hunaid [First Aid] - "It is currently useful and will also be required."
Me [Compass] - "It is mentioned that nobody is injured. So I think our priority should be finding the route to head back."

Abhishek - "But it is a plane crash and logically speaking there might be minor injuries."

Me - "Okay, fine." 

Others settled in for the first aid kit.

So each one of us marked : Rank #1 - First Aid Kit

Rank #2:
Hunaid [Compass] - "We need to find our way out of this jungle."
Abhishek [Knife] - "We need to make our way so we need something to cut through shrubs and bushes."
Me [to Abhishek] - "Then why don't you suggest Machete."
Abhishek - "What is a machete ?"
Others had the same puzzled look
I started explaining them that it is a long toothed knife which will make our task of cutting through the jungle much easier than the knife.
Inside my head I was happy - I scored some points for knowledge :)
After discussing for a few more minutes, we concluded our discussion on 2nd rank.

So each one of us marked : Rank #2 - Compass

Rank #3:

The affair was getting messier as we moved towards this one. 

Each one of us suggested a different item backing our claim.

I suggested - "Cigarette Lighter!"

"Aise samay mein kaun cigarette pene ki sochta hai." - Hunaid [who later told me that he ranked the lighter on number 13 in his list]

Others laughed.

I said -"We need it for fire. Fire was the turning point for humankind. It will help us in cooking, protection against wild animals and lighting our way."

The bald man standing in the corner smirked. I had a strange gut feeling. This one statement of mine will get me through.

Everyone agreed. 

So each one of us marked : Rank #3 - Cigarette Lighter

After a few more rounds of discussion we ranked Anti-venom and Vacuum Flask at fourth and fifth position respectively.

The pretty lady announced it was time to conclude.

Abhishek summarized our entire discussion.

Arihant and Pawan not even uttered a single word, just like what had happened to me in my first GD.

We moved out for the next group to come inside. 

And deep down inside my heart I was happy.

I knew I had nailed it this time. 

Up Next    : Act II Scene III [ITC : My First Interview]

Internship Hunt - Act II Scene I [ITC : Cigarettes]

Previously : Act I Scene II [HUL : Restraint]

"Yaar, Its already six. Hurry Up!" - Amit shouted.
"Coming, just a second."
After tying my shoe laces, I sprayed some deo, looked inside my folder. Everything was there - a pen , few torn sheets of paper, a hardcopy of my resume. Amit was waiting for me on his bicycle. I locked my room and rushed to mount on his carrier.
On our way to the Lecture Hall Complex we were cursing HUL which had come to our campus before and hoped this time we would make it through, afterall it was the next best industrial internship open for our department.
There was a huge rush in L-17. It was a internship-cum-placement talk. The entire lecture hall was packed to the last seat. I was holding a bookmarked Revolution 2020. Took the corner-most seat and continued reading my book. Back in my mind I was sure I wouldn't make it through the GD again.
The PPT started. HR officials introduced few IITK passouts currently working in the company laying emphasis on the fact that they are leading a 'happy' life . To cut it short the PPT wasn't about soap or food manufacturing, but all about "cigarettes". They took pride in making those sticks and why shouldn't they? After all they are providing benefits to so many farmers. With their programs such as e-Choupal I surely started respecting this company.
Who knows whether it is just for publicity?
Is it that well implemented ?
But surely it is a step forward.
What's the point of profit worth billions if you don't give something back to the society.

Up Next    : Act II Scene II [ITC : Fire]

GeekHead #1

Well I was quite inspired by Bob Biswas and started my own series of GeekHeads.
This one is for a junior who is REALLY interested in hacking!

Hope you liked it !!

Website Live Again \m/

Well after taking down my website for 2 months finally its time to be live again :)
With lesser content and greater emphasis on the aesthetics it looks cool ( isn't it :P ? )
Check it out :

http://home.iitk.ac.in/~amahato/

Geek Tale #1 : Was It a Dream ??

#Written on 16-12-2009.


One fine Sunday ... ( I verified the day from my mom .. she told today is tuesday. This is what happens when you get a month off after a hectic sem ends in IIT - You don't bother whether it is sunday, monday or any other day as you are so busy relaxing and eating that you wish this time to freeze ) ... bored you enough huh... now back again ...


One fine Tuesday ... I got up at 6 o'clock to surf internet and download a movie ('Paa'). Download started .... 0% ... 1 % .. 2 hrs remaining . In the meantime I was checking my mail which had about 81 unread messages (41 facebook , 29 orkut , 8 newsletters and 3 personally addressed). Facebook & orkut messages went to trash ... read those newsletters which were actually advertisements ... thrash :x ... now the 3 messages...One was sent by someone whose email id read as unowho007kumar@gmail.com and the content of the message was as usual - ' Identify me if u can ! ' .... I recognized this kind of email-id can be possessed by only one guy - Monoj Kumar ... a friend from my school days who used to torture our ears ! ... School Days ... I wish to relive those days ... phew .. but time has flowed ... I moved on ..The next message was sent by Osama (not the one whose image came in your mind :P). It was to inquire whether I was in kanpur or jamshedpur. I wanted to pay him a surprise visit so I replied i'm in kanpur.
Then came the message for which you have waited for so long... It was sent by someone who claimed that he was in std. 11 and was studying in my school and wanted some help regarding a programming question .. hmmm.. I quickly browsed thro' the question ... it was familiar to my eyes .. 
I had already come across that question in 12th std. while I was preparing for a programming competition... M*I**L(currently in 12) had given me the question as a challenge stating that it was asked in an International Olympiad. At that time I just looked it for 5 minutes .. calculated in my mind that I could not solve it ... pocketed that question saying i'll try it at home ... but I never tried to solve it ... saying that I have no time .. gotta prepare for JEE
but reality was something different ... I feared .. u heard it right ... I did not want to loose this challenge and my confidence ... so made a very good excuse and escaped.


But see the fate ... the same thing the same fear ... it came back again ... but itz just an email .. delete it .. who cares .... nope solve it this time ... otherwise it will remain as a burden in your mind ... and many such random thoughts were flashing in my mind.


In the meantime ... Download Complete ! .. yippee ... and a voice said - relax dude ... your sem has just ended ... take a break .. leave the question aside and enjoy the movie ... But i was feeling leaden. I went back to my bed and ... i don't know what happened ...


My next vision ... It was a room full of ........ air .. you got it right - it was empty. I turned to my right and saw a computer occupying the damp and dark corner. Sensing no way out, I went near the ordinary PC. Something was already running on the screen .... Before I could see the name of the application (my wild guess - BlueJ as its interface was familiar to the application running on screen) characters started floating out of the screen and enlarged .... soon a river of characters started appearing .. enlarging .. arranging ... disappearing in front of my eyes ... trying to convey what hadn't struck me in the past 1 year .... yeah ... it was in front of me... unbelievable ... the entire algorithm to solve the problem program ..... my eyes ... popping out ... out of sheer excitement and .....I saw my mom's face. Her hands were on my shoulder .. shaking me ... a signal to get out of the bed .. it was 11 o' clock ... my mom told me that today I showed a very peculiar behavior .. my eyes were open and she thought that I was awake but in reality I was not ... I did not bother to listen to her. Quickly switched on my computer. I still had a faint memory of that algorithm .. quickly wrote the corresponding code ... no compiler error .. no runtime error .. program successfully running in front of my eyes ... but some deep thoughts were still traveling in my mind -
was it really a dream ... a deja vu .. or a creation of my mind which over the year had reached a solution without my knowing it .... i have no answer .. a mere lucky coincidence perhaps .. whatever it was it relieved me of a burden today ... the fear had vanished .... but the wait continues .... wait for more such dreams which come true ..

Fractals - Vicsek

Vicsek fractal is also known as Vicsek snowflake or box fractal.
The basic square is decomposed into nine smaller squares in the 3-by-3 grid. The four squares at the corners and the middle square are left, the other squares being removed. The process is repeated recursively for each of the five remaining subsquares.
An alternative construction (shown below in the left image) is to remove the four corner squares and leave the middle square and the squares above, below, left and right of it. The two constructions produce identical limiting curves, but one is rotated by 45 degrees with respect to the other.
The Vicsek fractal is the set obtained at the limit of this procedure. The Hausdorff dimension of this fractal is log 5/log 3 ≈ 1.46497. (Source : Wikipedia)

Moving ahead ...
I created Viscek fractal using python module tkinter and its inbuilt canvas. A simple python 2.x code to visualize it is given below ...